thomasnield
12/13/2019, 5:04 PM2005: Please provide your password
2009: Also what's your mother's maiden name?
2011: And click all the boxes that don't have store fronts.
2016: We texted you a security code. Please provide it here too.
2019: Now scan your index finger.
2022: Verify your identity and location by describing the weather.
2024: We texted your mother-in-law a passcode. Please call her and provide it here too.
2030: Sign in with your 2048-bit public key here. Then plug in your private YubiKey dongle.
You can now online order your Starbucks drink. That will be $4.95. Would you like to use PayPal?
From PayPal: did you authorize this transaction of $4.95 to Starbucks on 12/8? Text "Y" to confirm.